‘Simpsons’ family better known than First Amendment rights

Robert Alvis

Anytime a new study comes out showing that many Americans don’t value health, or are obsessed with pop culture, or even if they approve of the president or governor, it usually barely raises an eyebrow. I already know this stuff.

A new study, however, should worry us.

The study, done by the new McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum, displays American’s ignorance when it comes to their First Amendment rights.

It found that 71 percent of Americans couldn’t name at least two of the five freedoms guaranteed to them in the First Amendment.

Some of that 71 percent vote. They have a hand in deciding the fate of the nation and can’t name some of the most important freedoms guaranteed to us in one of the most important documents in our country.

Only 9 percent could name three or more.

Just to be clear, the five freedoms guaranteed by the First Amendment are the freedom of speech, religion, press, assembly and petition for redress of grievances.

Fortunately, though, walking around campus, many students knew at least two, with very few not being able to name one.

The responses varied from “Aren’t those the Bill of Rights?” Ouch. To “Let’s see, there’s freedom of speech, religion, press – uhhh – assembly.” Yeah, that petition one got me too.

Maybe between naps and periodic cramming for exams, we were able to soak in some of that knowledge given to us in our general education classes.

There is a sensible reason behind those first two years. Getting those general education classes helps us to be less dumb than the general public, and that’s fun.

We can’t expect the youth of America to learn this stuff in school. They get American history once every three years.

They still learn that Christopher Columbus discovered America. The same way I discovered electricity when my alarm clock went off this morning.

Other findings in the study included American’s ability to name cartoon characters, American Idol judges, and advertising slogans.

They were all better than the First Amendment with one in five being able to name all five members of the Simpson family, one in four can name all three judges from “American Idol” and 65 percent know that “Keeps going and going and going” belongs to Energizer batteries.

I don’t fault American’s for having this knowledge. We are inundated with these things on a daily basis and during football season FOX plays “The Simpsons” promo only about 600 times a game, so even if you don’t watch “The Simpsons,” there is a good chance you could name at least Homer and Bart.

When “The Simpsons” first aired many parents were upset at FOX for allowing a show with Bart saying such things “Don’t have a cow, man” and “Eat my shorts.”

It was the First Amendment that allowed not only the creators of the show to form Bart like they did, but also to allow the other side to complain about it.

Those complainers didn’t have any problems exercising their rights. Now if they only knew where they came from.