Many of my raving fans have suggested that I discontinue my association with other humans, due to my complete lack of fondness of most people. As a tribute to you, I will be considering this as an option. Imagine all the things I wouldn’t have to deal with ever again: Lazy people, rude people, bloodsucking politicians, sorority girls, children, my family, etc. However, it’s impossible for me to pursue this, as the conveniences of modern life are unattainable without contact with others. Additionally, I really don’t care for nature too much, and I don’t think I could live without someone to complain to, so you all are out of luck. I think I will need to maintain my connection with society after all.