CSU Chancellor Charles Reed couldn’t pass muster in any of the classes I’ve taken recently, at least based on his stunningly bad performance last week before a legislative committee about Reed’s $662 million computer boondoggle called “Common Management System.”

Listening to Reed bobble flaming questions from seriously pissed off state legislators about his pet project, was like listening to a student who hasn?t read the text try to B.S. the professor who WROTE the text.

His answers to the committee were usually long-winded, often obtuse and sometimes just plain wrong.

What Charlie needs is some advice from CSU students. We?re used to being tested, giving reports and submitting to authority. Everything Charlie needs to know he could have learned from any undergrad, such as:

1. Read the syllabus, bud.

Reed is so used to being a big kahuna chancellor that when he appeared before this Joint Legislative Audit Committee, he couldn?t turn off the urge to puff up big and pretend he was important.

When you blow more than $600 million, a little humility is in order.

It didn?t play well, right from the start, when he informed legislators that he had brought along four administrators who would tell them what they needed to know.

The committee demurely said “forget it,” and it went all downhill from there.

Oops.

(Charlie, it’s the committee that calls the meeting and sets the agenda, including who gets to speak. You insulted JLAC Chairwoman Rebecca Cohn (D-Saratoga) by coming into her classroom and deciding you were going to teach.)

2. Document your sources.

Early in his presentation to the JLAC, Reed asserted that the massive CMS project was comparable in scale and cost to Information Technology projects taken on by Ford, General Electric and the Pentagon.

But when pressed by Sen. Tom McClintock (R-Thousand Oaks) about how much those projects cost, Reed had to admit that he did not know. “I will try to find that out and share that with you,” he said.

Oops redux.

(Charlie, never use vague information to support an argument. They?ll call you on it every time.)

3. Get your facts straight.

As legislators peppered Reed with questions about the cost of the project, he told them that the CSU “never said CMS would save the university money.”

But that is simply not true. Reed told me during an interview last summer that CMS would save the university big bucks. And the auditor noted that since talk started about CMS in 1996, university officials touted the project “as achieving significant cost savings that can be redirected to other information technology investments.”

Oops thrice.

(History is a required course, Charlie, because it matters. Don?t be a revisionist. There are too many people listening who remember the past.)

4. Accept responsibility for your grade.

Reed reminded lawmakers early and often that he became the chancellor in 1998, two years after CMS talk started. What he didn?t emphasize was his enthusiasm in pushing the project forward, even if it meant cutting back on student services and educational budgets. Reed should step up and take responsibility for CMS, even though the plans were laid in 1996.

(That?s why you make the big coin, Charlie. It?s called “leadership.”)

5. Check the ?tude, dude.

The most amazing part of hearing was Reed?s attitude – administrative arrogance sprinkled with angry defiance – and this presented to a group looking for contrition and explanation.

“There has been damage to trust here. There needs to be a movement to rebuild that, not just in the answers you provide, but also in terms of the tone,” said Chairwoman Cohn at the end of the 3 1/2-hour lambasting.

(Look, Charlie, it might be a good idea to say something like, “I?m sorry,” “My bad,” or the timeless, if shopworn, “Mistakes were made.” If you?re nervous about it, try practicing in front of a mirror.)

* * * *

Here are a few fun facts from last week?s 31/2 hour JLAC hearing:

“Off the top” money, the de facto CMS tax to collected by the Chancellor?s office from the 23 campuses: $10 million per year, total (does not include money spent by each campus for their own system).

Number of times Reed said “I don?t know” in response to a question he should have been able to answer: six.

Number of times Reed reminded the committee that he was not responsible for decisions made before he became chancellor in 1998: five.

Number of times lawmakers said they were “disturbed,” “concerned,” “deeply concerned” or “gravely concerned” about CMS: 32.

Number of times lawmakers asked Reed or one of his cadre to “just answer the question!”: eight.

JLAC hearings scheduled to further probe CMS: One more. At least.

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