Littered with ten chapters varying in names such as “Welcome to College,” “Men and Women” and “Facilities,” Steve Hofstetter’s book is a masterpiece, a collection of college truths. No longer will the average college student think they are alone in resisting the urge to call the ex-boyfriend or girlfriend at 5:00 a.m. completely trashed, or say after drinking for 24 hours straight that you will “never drink again,” and then realize that the word “again” really means ’till Thursday.

Titled “Student Bodyshots,” this book is filled to the brim with witty, sarcastic and truthful anecdotes on subjects that only a dorm living, procrastinating and hormonally driven college student could appreciate. Every minute aspect of “the best 4-6 years of your life” is commented on. Instant Messenger, Greek life and midterms are just a few of the topics Hofstetter has chosen to talk about.

This book will be extremely familiar to the reader. Flipping through the pages you will find yourself relating to the “experiences” and exclaiming out loud, “Hey, I thought I was the only one who did that!” Chapter 2, dubbed “The Daily Grind” for example, is filled with every day adventures that the majority of students have knowingly or unknowingly partaken in. One inevitable obligation is school. Although differences exist in people’s schedules, essentially everyone must go to a class at one time or another. Otherwise you wouldn’t spend all of your resources and time to be at college, right?

“Our routines, which sometimes include classes and studying, are what define us. But it’s the minutia that defines them. Everyone sleeps at some point, though some less often than others.

Everyone showers at some point, though again, some less often than others.” Written in the introduction to “The Daily Grind,” Hofstetter is able to join the college student body as a whole. Feel better about that crazy thing you did last night on top of the bar? Good. Some more interesting sayings from Hofstetter include:

“Why do professors still say ten-fifteen pages? Why can’t they just say nine pages with five lines on the tenth page?”

“The only kind of money college students ever have is a twenty dollar bill. Since ATM’s only give out twenties, you end up going to dinner with five people and no one has change. One guy ends up covering it, and everyone says they’ll pay him back as soon as they get change. Which never happens.”

“After 2:00 a.m. on a weekend, Instant Messenger should have a sobriety test. If you come home and can’t type ‘I’m not saying this because I’m drunk, I really think you should come over,’ with less than three mistakes, it’d be better off for everyone if you just went to sleep.”

Steve Hofstetter is a 2002 graduate of Columbia University’s School of General Studies. He also wrote Observational Humor, and writes for the CollegeHumor.com Web site. Whether it’s at Columbia University, or right here at our own Sac State, the experiences of college students always parallel one another.