Last Friday, those who decided to get off the couch and go watch the Sac State women?s soccer game were given an up-close look at why they should have stayed on the couch. They were treated to an intimate view of why soccer has never been, and never will be a successful professional sport in America.

Why? Because after they watched 120 minutes of gut-wrenching scorelessness, the game ended in a tie.

That?s just the way I want to spend two hours of my life?watching a couple of teams run up and down 300-feet of grass, wondering what those funny looking net-like things are doing at each end of the field. And why is the player who?s camped out under the net wearing a different jersey than everybody else on the team?

It?s a harsh reality, but a reality indeed. Soccer is boring.

I just can?t get excited about the prospect of a 0-0 tie. I can?t get into the idea of watching a game where the most exciting feature is a change of possession, or if you really want to go crazy, a missed goal attempt.

And who came up with this crap about ending a game in a tie.What kind of competition does that represent? Equality? Sure, you want to watch evenly matched teams, but come on, there has to come a point when one team has the better day, or one bit of extraordinary effort by one or two players puts their team in a position to win.

Not tie! WIN!

It?s kind of sad if you think about it. Soccer players are phenomenal athletes. They?re in great physical shape too. Compare them to any major league baseball team, where the estimated body fat of the 25-man roster is up around 30 percent, and you will see that these men and women who play soccer are a cut above what many Americans consider to be a fine athlete.

Then think about the goalie for a minute. Blocking a free kick has to be one of the top five hardest things to do in the sporting world. The ball comes at the goalie like a bullet, and if he or she hesitates, the ball is past them. What a skill?unfortunately those who have the skill can?t find anything more to do with it than be a soccer goalie. Even more unfortunately, that usually means standing around for most of the game, waiting for the ball to get past midfield.

It?s great that both Sac State?s men?s and women?s teams have improved from last season. It?s great that they are off to their best start ever. It?s good for the program, and it?s good for Sac State.

Or is it?

Will a good soccer team generate any kind of buzz around campus? The community? Probably not. Not because people don?t like to see winning teams, but because they don?t like the idea of watching tie games. They don?t like the idea of seeing 1-0 wins either.

So what can the sport of soccer do to make the game more exciting? It?s not that hard. All they have to do is take a few pointers from hockey. If I?m guaranteed a good fist fight that lasts until one player hits the ground, I?ll be there, and so will those who are already soccer fans. It?s well known that soccer fans in Europe have an unquenchable thirst for violence. They riot after almost every game, and there have even been cases of fans killing their team?s players.

I guess that?s good enough reason to keep soccer boring. If nobody cares, nobody riots. Comments E-mail [email protected]