Peanut butter and jelly. Cookies and milk. Drinking and sex.

Drinking is known for being a social lubricant – making slightly awkward situations more tolerable. Like the first time you meet someone, for example. Without alcohol you would be tense and nervous, but with some liquid courage you would feel more relaxed and confident.

This is not always the case with sex.

Don’t get me wrong – I’ll be the first person to suggest having a few drinks before getting frisky…but not always.

Drunk sex is probably my favorite kind of sex. Before drinking, you would kiss slightly and fumble to get your clothes off. After drinking, there are no pauses – only gasping for air between feverish make out sessions and fighting the urge to rip off the other person’s clothes. It’s like watching a prude caterpillar change into a nympho butterfly overnight.

I’m not saying you all should go to a bar and get wasted to have sex, but simply that it doesn’t hurt to have a glass of wine or two while setting the mood, especially while being with someone for the first time. The alcohol will lower your inhibitions and allow the inner sex god or goddess to be unleashed. Also, being slightly intoxicated will prolong the climax, allowing the sex act to be more wild and last longer than regular sex.

Be warned – having a few drinks is perfectly fine, but do not get too drunk.

Case in point: A few years ago I invited this guy over that I was seeing and really liked. We played some drinking games with a few friends and ended up getting pretty drunk. He ended up staying the night for the first time and I was pretty surprised to wake up in his arms – in a good way. We talked while I made breakfast and it turns out I was so drunk I didn’t remember sleeping with him. I think hearing that made me want to throw up more than the hangover did. Needless to say, it didn’t work out between us.

Besides blacking out like a complete fool, being wasted is never cute: the sloppiness, the slurring, the inability to control bodily functions…no

I wouldn’t want some slumped-over person, slurring somewhat-awkward sexy statements, trying to hump me – such a turn off. No one wants to worry about their partner’s need to vomit while trying to be sexy and turn them on.

To be honest, there is nothing that can kill confidence faster than being flaccid – either being flaccid or not being able to arouse someone who is flaccid. Too much alcohol will most certainly cause this and that is only a good thing when you are trying not to go home with someone.

On that note, no one likes waking up in a bed with a stranger in it. Sure, you may have been best buddies taking all those shots last night. And sure, the idea of sharing a cab and watching a movie in bed together may have sounded like a brilliant plan. But this morning, with a violent hangover, that extra body in bed is nothing but unwanted.

Drunk sex when done right can be very enjoyable for both people involved, but if you are too drunk, the night will most likely end with one person starved for sex and the other’s head in a toilet.

Ashley can be reached at: [email protected]