With names like “the horizontal tango,” “knockin’ boots,” “the nasty” or just plain ol’ “gettin’ some,” it’s difficult to think that sex is nothing more than a walk in the park. Sure, it seems like all you need is two people to have sex and that’s it. But really, only in a perfect world would sex be so carefree, like a fairy tale behind closed doors. For all we know, Prince Eric gave Ariel crabs.

That’s why Amber Madison, a 22-year-old graduate of Tufts University, wrote a book aimed to educate women about the more technical side of sex. “Hooking Up: A Girl’s All-Out Guide to Sex and Sexuality” points out that, pleasure aside, sex also deals with the worries of STDs, using protection and contraception, pregnancy and choosing the right partner with whom to share all these concerns.

“I feel so strongly about not telling girls what to do, because that’s not my place,” Madison said in a telephone interview. Instead, she said she wants to help them make informed choices by providing accurate information.

In the first chapter, cleverly titled “Vaginas: What the Hell?,” Madison encourages the reader to become familiar with the land down under. She writes on the first page, “-understanding what’s going on with your vagina is the first step to being comfortable with sex and the key to having enjoyable sexual experiences.”

The book is humorous in that Madison shared her experiences with typical sexual and bodily concerns. She told a story of when she decided to use an over-the-counter, one-day cream to treat a yeast infection. Madison advises against using the one-day treatment, saying it stung too much for her, causing her to frantically splash water between her legs.

“When my housemate came home from the library at one in the morning, she caught me naked on my floor straddling her desk fan,” Madison wrote. The three-day treatment would be the best choice because “it won’t send most girls running for the faucet.”

As a former sex columnist for her college newspaper, much of the material she covered in her book stems from questions she received from her friends and other people seeking her advice.

“I got so many girls asking me about sex stuff,” Madison said. “I’ll get some emails, or they’d call me, and even if I didn’t know the answer, it’d be like, ‘What’s my first step to get the answer?'”

Madison took a personal look at it when it came to figuring out exactly what to include in her book. “One thing I thought of was, ‘What did I need to hear and what do I need to understand?’ It’s all about making decisions based on what you really want for yourself and not based on outside pressure.”

Madison’s openness stems from her parents who were always honest and direct when it came to talking about sex, pointing out their knack for writing sexual rap songs for their friends’ birthdays and exchanging sex jokes back and forth.

However, Madison plans on using a different parenting style when the time comes for her to raise her own children.

“I might end up more conservative. I plan on making a lot of penis jokes, but not as extreme as my childhood,” Madison laughed.

Some people aren’t aware that having unprotected oral sex puts them at risk for STDs such as gonorrhea, which Madison noted as the second-most common bacterial STD (chlamydia is the first). Gonorrhea can affect the throat as well as the vagina and the penis. Madison said that often times there aren’t any symptoms, but the most common is a sore throat.

Madison plans to travel the university lecture circuit and maybe give co-ed lectures, which sound better than her cocktail waitress job she had while writing her book.

“I hope I can dedicate more of my time to something I care about and not just serving martinis,” Madison joked. “If I can make a living going around colleges and talking about sex, that’s my dream job. It all works out ok.”

Aleesa Camagong can be reached at [email protected]