There’s too many students, not enough teachers,

“Intro to Football” is held in the bleachers.

The end of the weekday Friday hay day

Has the school newspaper headlining “May Day!”

Roosters have joined fraternity houses

?Cause the T-shirts are cooler than feathery blouses,

And it should come as no surprise

That Burger King is nuking fries,

While Java City is brewing jive,

And beer is cheaper at The Hive.

Teach-in is given so class is dismissed

To teach taxpayers and public the professors are pissed.

10,000 commuters daily speed for a place,

Their homework can never keep up with the pace.

And now they’ve fenced off Parking Lot 4 ?

Gerth’s giving birth to parking galore.

(Math majors have numbers like ten to the seventh,

But nothing can equal September 11th).