‘Footloose’ falls flat on face

Chanel Saidi

“Footloose” could possibly be one of the worst remakes in history. Hollywood has yet again triumphed in destroying a beloved classic. From the beginning scenes, it is evident the directors were trying far too hard to replicate the 1984 version.

It seems improbable to think a small town in our day and age could outlaw something such as music or dance. The idea would strike any of us as unrealistic so maybe that is why updating this movie to modern times did not work.

If a guy could try and fail to take the word “God” out of the Pledge of Allegiance, one can be assured that attempting to bring a religiously inspired law abolishing dance and music would not succeed anywhere in this country. The writers could have tried to update the conflict the teenagers face in order to make it more relevant to our day and age.

Kenny Wormald falls short in his attempt to reach Kevin Bacon’s performance of Ren MacCormack. Wormalds’ acting in the movie is sub-par, but his dancing skills pulled him through the role.

However, Wormald epically fails at recreating the dance scene in which Ren is blowing off steam by dancing through the warehouse. This sad display of dancing would make any original “Footloose” fan cringe. If there was any point in the movie that his dancing skills were most important, this would be it – and he did not cut it.

Julianne Hough plays Ariel Moore in the movie. In attempting to update the film, they turned a preacher’s daughter meets bad girl into a total floozy: turning in the original Ariel’s conservative outfits for daisy dukes and aviators catering to a Miley Cyrus generation of fans.

If girls can dress like this in the small town, then the reverend getting rid of dancing because it promotes sex for young adults would be pointless. One would think the writers would have thought of this tiny inconsistency before throwing short skirts on the actresses to sell more movie tickets.

In one of the most sensitive scenes in the movie dealing with domestic violence, the topic is sugarcoated – losing its significance. The directors seem to glaze over the scene turning it to a Disneyesque version of what happens when relationships become abusive.

This film has turned a ‘80s favorite into a cheap version of some type of “High School Musical” movie: trading in classic rock-and-roll songs for rap, and fun dance moves for break dancing and country line dancing. The film focused far more on “sex sells,” missing the point of the film they were sadly attempting to mimic.

If the movie had possibly tried to at least be a little different, rather than copying the 1984 version’s script verbatim, it could have been better.

Chanel Saidi can be reached at [email protected]