My parents were divorced when I was really young. I was so young that I don’t remember a time when my parents lived together.

My first memory is living in an apartment with my brother and my mother. My mom was a waitress and money was hard to come by. Supporting three people on minimum wage is not easy to do.

My father was not doing much better. He was living in town working a temporary construction job. Eventually, he moved out of town, remarried and had two daughters with his new wife.

My mom ended up meeting a Mexican immigrant at the restaurant where she worked. He hardly knew English and wasn’t making much more money than my mother.

By the time I was 5 years old I had two families. I had brothers and sisters, and two sets of loving parents. Sure, remnants of the divorce definitely caused strain between both sides for many years to come.

But my situation now is pretty advantageous. With my mother — where I grew up — I have four brothers. I was fortunate to see three of them be born and grow up into adorable young men. In addition, I have a stepfather who loves me and has acted in every manner growing up as a biological father would to his own children. He learned English, got a good job and eventually became an American citizen. All of these steps were in an effort to support his family, which included two stepchildren he really had no obligation to. If my mom never met him, I know my life would not be as good as it is now.

My father and I did not have the closest relationship growing up. That was tough, but understandable. With his strained relationship with my mother, I can understand why it was difficult to set up times to be with me. He also had a lot of odd jobs that kept him away from home for months. He went to Kuwait during the first Gulf War, he spent months in a tent on a construction job and he also spent some time in Taiwan. Likewise, all of these jobs were in an effort to support his family.

Eventually, as I became older, my father and I developed an awesome relationship. We discovered we have the same interests, enjoy the same leisure activities and also just enjoy each other’s company. I also grew closer to my sisters and my stepmother. All this was happening while my father bought a house and started working a job that was better for him and our family. I now spend a couple weekends each month at their place just hanging out. Interestingly enough, one of my sisters is a student at Sacramento State.Don’t get me wrong — I did have difficult times growing up. There were times that the divorce caused great pain in everyone’s life. I don’t even remotely suggest that this path could be a good one for most people. Sometimes, however, we are given a certain set of cards and we have to play with what we are dealt. I was given a pair of twos and it turned into a royal flush.

Right now, I have a lot of people who love me. There is family from both sides making sure I get through my college years as smoothly as possible and chances are they will be doing the same for my entire life.

Divorce is really tough on those of us who are forced to deal with the failed decisions of our parents. And while I would not wish or condone divorce for anyone, if we play the cards we have, we find that we may actually have a better situation than we would have had if our parents were married and unhappy.