Starring Julianna Margulies, Ron Eldard, Desmond Harrington, Isaiah Washington and Gabriel Byrne

Directed by Steve Beck

Produced by Joel Silver, Robert Zemeckis and Gil Adler

Written by Mark Hanlon and John Pogue

Distributed by Warner Bros.

Running time: 85 mins.

Rated R

Ahoy, mates! Are you ready for a high seas adventure with excellent characters, intense thrills and chills, and a great plot that has you on the edge of your seat? If you are, then you’d better not watch “Ghost Ship,” because it doesn’t have any of those things.

“Ghost Ship” tells the tale of supernatural death and destruction, minus the suspense or interest required to make them, well, interesting. Weak storytelling and an extremely disappointing ending make this a less-than-stellar film. The only redeeming feature is a well-done opening scene. Other than that, you’d be well advised to avoid this stinking pile of sea crap while you still have the chance.

The film opens with a slightly deceptive opening scene depicting the downfall of a luxurious ocean liner. You wouldn’t expect a horror movie to start like an episode of “I Love Lucy,” but this one does. As nostalgic 1950?s music plays, pink titles introduce the film before the title pops up in a pink bubble gum font. The mood is seemingly evocative of harmless fun.

We’re then taken to a pleasant nighttime scene where dozens of people dance above deck on their posh Italian vessel, the Antonia Graza. Somber, moody music creeps in and the stage is set for the film’s one great horror scene that’s beautiful in all of the wrong ways. A disturbing event so brutal, grisly, and mind-blowing that fright fans will be grinning with delight while squeamish viewers will become unsettled.

Decades later, a pilot named Ferriman (Desmond Harrington of “We Were Soldiers”) recruits a crew of tugboat salvagers led by Murphy (Gabriel Byrne of “End of Days”) and Epps (Julianna Margulies of TV’s “ER”) to find a mysterious phantom ship he spotted one night. The ship is the aforementioned Antonia Graza, which disappeared 40 years before.

Because the ship is in international waters, whoever finds it can claim it and the priceless treasures aboard. Our heroes, seduced by the possibility of wealth, sail into the deep blue sea, but their mission is complicated by, you guessed it, ghosts!

When they board the doomed vessel, the salvagers find no life vests and, at first, no bodies. However, they discover a digital watch, something they wouldn’t expect to see on a ship that vanished in the 1960s. They also find a few fresh corpses, definitely not from the 1960s. Epps encounters a little girl ghost (Emily Browning) who talks to her and drops clues about their predicament. There’s some gold too. And breasts. Can’t forget the breasts. And though this may sound intriguing, the payoff is lackluster: “Ghost Ship” fails mainly because of bad story development.

Important clues surface, and, as a viewer, you wonder what happened on the Antonia Graza and how. Unfortunately, the answer is presented in a sudden flashback sequence that seems purposed to tie up loose ends instead of providing a well-rounded resolution. The flashback itself is well executed, but its abrupt infusion into the film makes for sloppy storytelling.

The actors do a fine job, but none of the performances stand out. Margulies plays a capable, tough-as-nails heroine, but she’s got nothing to write home about. Save for her, there aren’t many memorable characters aside from the villain and two ghosts: the little girl and Francesca, a sultry singer in a red dress (played by Francesca Rettondini). Like most horror films, there are several deaths that make you think, “Damn. What a way to go.” But most of them are uneventful, and they pale in comparison to the gruesome introduction. The ending is a total let down, and the final battle with the main villain is anti-climactic and way too short.

All in all, “Ghost Ship” could have been much better. The filmmakers packed most of the good stuff in first few minutes, and the rest of the film just doesn’t measure up. You should steer clear of this sinking ship until it surfaces in local video stores.