The saying goes that men are from Mars and women are from Venus.I say some of you men are stuck on Pluto.

Did you really think that stripper was sincere when she said she liked you?There are reasons people lie.

After careful consideration, I’ve decided to do a little charity work to help the Plutonians find their way back to Mars.

For this reason, we will discuss women who lie–and not because I’m against my own, ladies, but because some of these poor male souls need our help.There are three main reasons — and a host of sub-reasons — why women lie to men; but for the sake of simplicity, we will address three.

Reason one: She wants something.

In the stripper’s case (mentioned above), it was the $20 bill in your back pocket.This is the same gal who slammed four tequila shots with you at the bar — you were buying — and scribbled her bogus phone number down on your soggy napkin.

Don’t leave yourself wide open.

Here’s a helpful hint: Next time call her number on your cell phone to make sure it’s working before you buy her second drink.

Reason two: She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.

This is a very popular reason indeed, especially for the nice girls.

Take, for instance, the girl who says, “I don’t want to ruin our friendship.” Some girls may even tell you that you’re like a brother to them.

Right.

Now, don’t panic if this has ever happened to you because there is a small chance that the girl was actually being straightforward.

Maybe you’ve known each other since second grade and you used to come over to play Transformers with her brother.

But if that’s not the case, chances are that this female thinks you’re too much of a nice guy to say bluntly how she could never, ever, in a million years, envision herself sleeping with you.

This girl enjoys your conversation but thinks your jeans are too tight, or maybe it’s your hair.

My advice: Don’t dig too deep. The truth can hurt.

It may also be helpful to note that reason two is also responsible for phrases like, “It’s not the size that matters,” or, “Don’t worry, sweetie; it happens to everyone.”

Last, but not least, there’s reason three: She’s doesn’t want to argue.Typically, this applies to married couples and others in committed relationships.It’s when your woman asks you for money and you give her an hour-long lecture about spending money.

Two weeks later, you ask her where she got that white velour jumpsuit with the matching sneakers and sparkly earrings.

She replies, “Huh? Oh, this? It’s old.”

What your lady really means is that she went shopping with her friends Saturday afternoon and hid a pile of yellow Forever 21 bags in the trunk of her car.

On Monday morning, she played dress-up after you left for work, spreading each new treasure out on the bed just before hanging it in the closet. So what’s the lesson to be learned?

Women lie (just like men do) to get what they want, spare your feelings or avoid being hassled.

It’s inevitable.

However, the more we learn about each other’s primitive natures, the better off we are.

So men, there’s a space shuttle heading back to Mars. Get on it!

Or better yet, maybe the shuttle should make another stop and bring all of us back down to earth.

Carrie Espiritu can be reached at [email protected]