Dave Mason

 

 

What makes an athlete “hot”?

 

 

 

1. The media and fans only use your first name.

Examples: Shaq. Peyton. LeBron. Danica. Kevin.

OK, maybe not the last one. But I hope one day every person in America knows Kevin Love for who he is – the second greatest Timberwolf ever. Sorry, Latrell Sprewell.

2. You don’t turn down endorsements.

Peyton Manning endorses everything from televisions to Oreo cookies. The guy doesn’t have a personality, yet he makes nearly $15 million a year from endorsements. That’s a superstar.

 

 

3. You pass the “Mom Test.” This is a huge factor, and the requirement that’s hardest to fulfill. If an athlete is truly hot, your mother should be able to recognize them on television.

 

 

Very few athletes have reached this level of hotness unless they were featured on “Dancing with the Stars.” Michael Jordan passes this test, and right now Brian Wilson could pass this test.

Is Wilson on MJ’s level?

 

 

Absolutely not, but the trademark beard, odd personality and World Series ring help him pass the “Mom Test.”

 

 

The rest of the hottest athlete requirements will be in Chapter 11 of my 2045 best-selling book.

 

Cassie Kolias

For the hottest athlete I know that I could go the easy route and pick one who everyone in the country thinks is hot. The Tom Bradys and the Alex Rodriguezs of the world. The Brian Wilsons or the Buster Poseys (I had to include them for all the bandwagoners out there). But I’m not going to.

 

Unless you are an A’s fan, or an extremely well-rounded MLB fan, you may have never heard of Ryan Sweeney.

 

Sweeney is a 26-year-old outfielder who might literally be the most attractive person who I have ever seen.

 

I’m a fan of tall men. Sweeney is 6-foot-5.

 

I’m a fan of deep voices. Sweeney has this deep, almost smoky voice that I could listen to him read the dollar menu at McDonald’s and think it’s the sexiest thing I have ever heard.

 

I’m a fan of birthday presents. Sweeney was the hottest and best present that the A’s could have given me. Three years ago, Sweeney was traded to Oakland on Jan. 3 (which is my birthday – mark that on your calendars.)

 

Overall, Sweeney is the perfect man. He’s tall, filled out, with light brown eyes the color of milk chocolate.

 

I’d choose Ryan Sweeney over just about any man in Hollywood.

 AJ Taylor

Mysterious, intelligent, toned and tan – Allison Stokke is nearly perfect. A pole vaulter from UC Berkeley, Stokke’s popularity exploded when some smoking hot pictures of her showed up online.

 

She makes an appearance in just about every “Hottest Female Athletes” list, most of the time, is ranked above all others. And for good reason, Stokke is every college guy’s dream.

 

She holds five national pole vaulting records.  I would rather go to dinner and a movie with Stokke than with any of the other overly sexual female athlete choices. When looking for the finest female athlete I became bogged down in Maxim Magazine photoshoots of  Danica Patrick and Anna Kournikova.

 

Even a professionally Photoshopped, cropped and airbrushed photo of Kournikova cannot compare with the unadulterated form of a true woman like Stokke.

 

This works out perfectly for me. My summers are spent in the Bay Area, which means that only a short BART ride separates me from Stokke.