The student news site of Sacramento State University

The State Hornet

Student news without fear or favor
The student news site of Sacramento State University

The State Hornet

The student news site of Sacramento State University

The State Hornet

Student news without fear or favor
Graphic created in Canva by Brionna Woody
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EDITORIAL: No more clowning around

By+Graeme+Maclean+-+originally+posted+to+Flickr+as+bad+clown%2C+CC+BY+2.0
By Graeme Maclean – originally posted to Flickr as bad clown, CC BY 2.0

It has been said that laughter is the sound of surprise.

And what’s more surprising than seeing a grown man in garish clown makeup jumping out from behind some bushes and brandishing a machete?

In America, there is a rich tradition of tricking and treating every Halloween, but the tradition of creeping and spooking has begun a few months early this year.

Across the nation, young men have taken to donning polka-dotted outfits, painting their faces and intimidating strangers. More frequently, though, the pranking takes the form of people making empty threats on social media that clowns will be showing up nearby. There has also been a rash of false 911 calls about clowns leading police on wild goose chases.

The clowning around has even gotten alarmingly close to home. Sacramento County schools added security after an Instagram post by sac.townclowns that included a “school hit list.”

Halloween is just around the corner, and as an epidemic of creepy clowns sweeps the nation, let’s take a minute to ponder the nature of pranking.

We could ask these clowns to follow the Golden Rule: don’t do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you. Maybe if we find out who they are, we can dress up as something they deeply fear and brandish a weapon at them. Dinosaur with a hatchet, witch with a spiked mace, anything really.

If they are caught in the act, what can they be charged with? Public douchiness? Resisting decency? Maybe for probation, they have to actually learn how to clown. Juggling, swallowing a bunch of handkerchiefs, the whole bit.

Seriously, though, if you go out this Halloween and feel threatened by one of these creepy clowns, do two things:

First, ask yourself if this person is actually trying to threaten you, or if they’re trying to out-meme the meme.

Second, if you really think they’re threatening you or anyone you know, call authorities and get yourself out of the situation. Lots of people have irrational fears, but a fear of weapons wielded by people with little common sense is just good instinct.

Lastly, we have a message to you wannabee Jokers, Ronald McDonalds, any and all Ringling Brothers, Barnums and Baileys. And you too, fake Benny HIll, Buster Keaton, Charlie Chaplin and Violent J.

This isn’t funny for anyone but you. And if you actually get people hurt, it’ll stop being funny for you real quick. The history of clowning as a performance is long, and was once dignified as the forefront of humor; now after decades of being a phobia, it’s being dragged down further.

Stephen King was right. Adults are the real monsters. At least you’ll all fit in one cop car.

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